I was one of those kids who wanted to do EVERYTHING. I went through a phase when I wanted to play every sport. Growing up, I tried soccer, basketball, tennis, swimming, baseball, track, gymnastics, volleyball, and powder puff football. I wanted to learn instruments; I took violin and piano lessons and since college I have really enjoyed singing and learning the guitar. I loved art. I wanted to be the president when I was in fourth grade (and I really convinced myself for a couple months that I would be the first female president of the United States). I wanted to be an Olympic athlete, and I thought about doing this via figure skating, gymnastics, bobsledding (I seriously looked into it after the 2002 Winter Olympics in Salt Lake), and the skeleton. I've gone through MANY different ideas of what I would be when I grew up - marine biologist, fiction author, doctor, psychologist, English teacher, college professor, journalist, corporate trainer... I've always thought it would be neat to spend my life learning languages. So far, I've only gotten anywhere with Spanish, but I still dream about it. I loved to be involved in clubs: SOS (Students Offering Service), Student Council, Honors Student Advisory Council (at BYU), the English Society, tutoring, etc.
Now, I don't share all of this to win your praise. I look at it and it is almost overwhelming sometimes all of the things I've tried or want to try. Since college, I have had to learn some hard lessons about time management and the reality that we can't do EVERYTHING. I've fought this for a long time, but more recently, it has become apparent that in life, we must pick and choose between different and equally good options.
Does this mean I'm giving up on my dreams? I certainly hope not. I still want to try new hobbies, learn languages, play different sports, do interesting things in a career, be involved in the community, and enjoy all that life has to offer. Variety will forever be the spice of my life. But, I'm realizing the simple truth that life is about the quality of our experiences.
As much as I want to be a Renaissance woman, I also want to be able to be able to say that I actually focused on a few things and accomplished something. I want to actually be good at one or two things. As I've grown up, I've realized that people who accomplish great things often had to sacrifice many other good things in order to achieve goals like becoming Olympic athletes or world-famous scholars. Passion and pure talent usually aren't enough; work is required to reach such potential.
Anyhow, I've found the process of widdling down my interests a challenge. Picking a career, for example, is not easy, because no one career has EVERYTHING that I want. But, refusing to make a choice will never result in satisfaction, only in the empty hopes of a possibility. Growing up means making choices, and I hope that I'm finally learning how to pick and choose the best of what's available to me, and I'm blessed to have a more-than-plentiful basket of choices.
I guess I'm cursed in a way with an interest in everything. I always thought it was a good thing to love everything, and I still think it is, but lately, I've been more envious of people who have been able to make solid decisions and stick with them, even when tempting alternatives present themselves. Open-mindedness is important, but so is focus. In the end, I don't want to just say that I sampled everything, but that I actually savored a few things.
Any thoughts on this? Is one mode of living better than the other? What have you done that's helped you to achieve this balance?
3 comments:
I can't say I've "sampled" things as much as Lauren, but whomever out there has the secret, let me know too please cuz I really don't have it figured out either!!
Yeah I've been wondering basically these exact same things lately, or at least for the year I've been home from a mission. I think it'd be good to have one main thing to concentrate on, but have lots of hobbies, trying to get the best of both worlds. But that whole limit of 24 hours in a day kinda sucks, doesn't it?
I've come to the conclusion that if I don't specialize in something I won't get a job and won't be able to support a family, which would be undesirable. So I guess I have no choice, I have to choose something.
I think maybe a scripture is involved in this: "...men [and women] should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness;" (D&C 58:27). I think every person should be involved in things that are worth while, but you obviously can't do everything that's good, so I guess each have to evaluate our own abilities and say: what am I good at? Where can I do the "most good"? What do I enjoy doing if I only had to pick my "top five"? Thus my ramblings...but I do think it's a good thing to struggle with - think of people who aren't even faced with the choices we enjoy!
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